€5 off first Book Purchase of €50+ | With Code: CHAPTERSBOOKSTORE
'Deepa is the epitome of a woman living in her power. Ask Me How It Works provides a stunningly vulnerable and poetic glimpse into her most intimate spaces and through her journey to sexual liberation. If this book doesn't change your perspective on relationships, nothing will' GILLIAN ANDERSON
----
Here is my husband.
Here is my boyfriend.
Here I am.
In the early hours of dawn in Amsterdam, Deepa Paul rises from her boyfriend's bed. She gets dressed, slips away with a kiss and cycles home, where she is welcomed into the arms of her husband, whose contentment is mellow alongside her own. There isn't a glimmer of shame, deception or guilt, only the honesty and compassion needed to make this kind of life possible - even if it wasn't always this easy.
You might have questions. Whose idea was it? What are the rules? Are you ever jealous? In this memoir, Deepa offers her answers openly and tenderly, as she explores the truth to questions of her own. Can I ask for what I want, and still honour the life I have chosen? Do I deserve it? Is it worth it?
Unexpectedly relatable and joyfully vibrant, this is one woman's story of discovering her own desires and how to liberate them, of shifting identities from mother to lover and back again, and of finding the courage to ask for the marriage she wanted, beyond the marriage she had.
One question at a time.
--
'A spectacular memoir written with verve and style' NANA DARKOA SEKYIAMAH
'A fascinating and big-hearted portrait of sex, intimacy and non-monogamy' CLOVER STROUD
'Reads like a long-overdue conversation with an old friend, will leave you thrilled and humming with possibility' YAEL VAN DER WOUDEN
'A generous-spirited, imaginative exploration of how to live life differently' REBECCA WAIT
- Publisher Name:Penguin Books Ltd
- Product Format:Paperback
- ISBN: XE80241698402
- Author:Deepa Paul
- Publication Date:2025-05-01
Refund Policy
If you are not satisfied with your order in any way, get in touch. We have an excellent customer service record and we will do our best to ensure you are pleased with your purchase.
📄 Exercise Your Right of Withdrawal
Under EU consumer law, you have the right to withdraw from your purchase within 14 days of receiving your order, without giving a reason. To formally exercise this right, use the button below. This is a distinct function separate from our general returns process.
Your right to cancel
If you order online, you have the right to cancel your order within 14 days of receiving your goods, without giving a reason. This cooling-off period runs from the day you (or someone you nominate) receives the last item in your order. To cancel, contact us at shop@chaptersbookstore.com stating your order number and your wish to withdraw from the purchase. Once we've confirmed your cancellation, you have 14 days to send the goods back to us.
Condition of returned items
To be eligible for a refund, your item must be returned unworn, unused and unread, in its original packaging, and in the same condition you received it. You'll also need your receipt or proof of purchase. If your return is based on the item's condition on arrival, please include a photo so we can advise the best resolution.
Faulty or damaged items
Please inspect your order on arrival and contact us immediately if an item is defective, damaged, or not what you ordered. Separately from the 14-day cancellation right above, you're entitled to a repair, replacement or refund on faulty goods for up to two years from purchase, under standard consumer guarantee rights.
This guarantee covers manufacturing faults only, such as printing errors, missing pages, or binding defects present at the time of purchase. It does not cover damage arising from normal use or wear, including creased spines, worn covers, marked pages or general signs of reading. If you're unsure whether an issue qualifies, send us a photo and we'll be happy to advise.
How to return
To start a return, contact us at shop@chaptersbookstore.com. If your return is accepted, we'll send you a return shipping label and instructions on how and where to send your package. Items sent back to us without first requesting a return will not be accepted. If a return is due to an error on our part, we'll cover the postage cost.
Exceptions and non-returnable items
Certain items cannot be returned, including custom products, special orders, sale items and gift cards.
Trade-In Programme
If you're trading in previously owned books rather than returning a purchase, please see our separate Trade-In Programme terms, which operate independently of this policy.
Refunds
Once we've received and inspected your return, we'll let you know if the refund has been approved. If approved, you'll be refunded automatically to your original payment method. Please allow some time for your bank or card provider to process and post the refund.
Free Delivery in the Republic Of Ireland on all orders over €30. Standard Delivery Charge in Republic of Ireland of €5 for all orders below €30.
Delivery is subject to warehouse availability. Out-of-stock items will be shipped as soon as possible, upon arrival from the manufacturer/publisher. Please take shipping time into consideration.
